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Winners and Losers of 2023: The Turtleboy Saga

Winners and Losers of 2023: The Turtleboy Saga

Project Constitution Exposes DeCastro Lies

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DeleteLawZ Promotes American Patriot

by Jim
December 27, 2023
in News
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Jose “Chille” DeCastro’s live infomercial was slightly delayed on Tuesday as he instead featured a lengthy review and interview of his American Patriot YouTube series that originally aired on the Don Andrew Investigates YouTube channel.

DeCastro announced that he was now on the fourth incarnation of his American Patriot YouTube channel as YouTube had mysteriously deleted the previous attempts at the channel. The YouTuber was pleased that he had already achieved 600 subscribers and stated that if he reached 1000 subscribers, he could monetize the channel and it would be harder for YouTube to remove the channel.

Calling YouTube’s actions against him “absolutely brutal” to watch, DeCastro mourned the loss of the channel, which features a fictionalized account of his time as “hero” to the people of Ironton, Ohio. DeCastro also failed to address a recently leaked e-mail in which he proposed fabricating characters for the video series and taking events out of context in order to tell the story.

Switching back to his infomercial format, DeCastro announced that he was selling his 5A Cop Cards at $8 for a set of two cards. He explained that he had previously priced them at $30 and $8 was the cost of producing the cards. He then claimed that even though he was selling the cards at cost, he would still make money off of each sale.

DeCastro then addressed claims that he had abused credit card information from purchases made on his website. He then went into a long story about how Bank of America was his credit card provider, and that Bank of America was the only one in the transaction that had actual customer card information. The diminutive complained bitterly about the processing fees that Bank of America charges per transaction and assured his viewers that their information was safe.

The infomercial ended early as DeCastro directed his fans to meet him over on his new channel for the premiere of his newest “American Patriot” segment.

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Jim

Jim

Jim Finch is a cranky old bastard.

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