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Oh, goose eggs, how I’ve missed you so! With the world focusing elsewhere as it’s the solstice and everyone online is lining up to kill each other, it’s glorious to know that, for at least one day, humanity can’t be saved, and no one gave these people anything!
Defend DMA in the fight against corruption and oath breakers stands at $570.00 out of a $20,000.00 goal and 2.85% of completion. Way to go, Christopher Cordova!
Craig Hendry’s To Support Craig’s work sits at $2,467.00 out of a $4,000 goal and a 61.68% completion rate.
Press with Rancor stands, well, where it always stands, $2406.00 out of a $45,000.00 goal and 5.35% completion rate.
Direct D’s Help Christoppher Ruff (Direct D) Clear His name fund is sticking to the ground at $11,365.00 out of a $100,000.00 goal and 11.37% completion rate. I’d pivot to journalism too since those court cases aren’t going anywhere at that rate.
The fake GoFundMe for Jose “Chille” DeCastro sits at $351.00 raised out of $20,000.00 and a 1.76% completion rate. Every single dollar is going to DeCastro! Honest! I mean, yeah, give it to a scammer instead of DeCastro if you’re gonna give it, or just pledge it to keep this column going forever and ever but… uhm. Dammit.
DeCastro’s Lawyer Fund Only – All Dollars go to Lawyers is closer to completion at a 82.81% completion rate, raising $20,702.00 out of a $25,000.00 goal.
His Legal Aid Fund, Donation Fund, Help People Fund has a 76.39% completion rate and has earned $26,735.00 out of a $35,000.00 goal.
Both are good, but what happened to his Legal Defense Fund Crime Scene Tape Illegal Arrest campaign? It’s sitting at 7.72% completion, with only $2,315.00 out of a $30,000.00 goal. Even with hearings in the case moved to August, it’s still not achieving like it should be.
For Public Safety’s fight Fraud *Recovered* fund is doing better, a 43.38% completion rate and $3,687.00 out of an $8,500.00 goal. Even with Fraudit Wrangler’s daily harping on this one, there’s been no movement at all lately.
Which brings us to the only real contender left: SeanPaul “Long Island Audit” Reyes. Four campaigns. Guess what they all have in common? Heh.
His Unlawful Arrest & Constitutional Rights fund is stuck at 23.01% completion with $3,301 raised out of an $10,000.00 goal.
The Support the Fight Against Tyranny & Corruption is at 93.01% completion and has raised $51,156.00 out of a $55,000.00 goal. The most impressive take so far out of all the auditors we’ve covered.
LIA’s Fund Legal Defense Against Unlawful Arrest is also close to completion with 81.56% done, and $16,311 raised out of a $20,000.00 goal.
His Help with Criminal Defense Attorney for this Case fund is at an impressive 86.60% completion rate, with $21,650.00 out of a $25,000.00 goal raised.
Lastly, his Help LIA with Legal Fees to Fight Tyrant’s Lawsuit fund is now at $1,891.00 out of a $2,500.00 goal and sits at a 75.65% completion rate.
What’s the common denominator in all of this, folks? What is it? Heh heh heh.
GOOSE EGGS ACROSS THE BOARD!
The countdown is on! SIX MORE DAYS! SIX MORE DAYS OF GOOSE EGGS AND THIS COLUMN RETIRES!
We can do it! Put your back into it! No more GoFundMe coverage!
We can do it! Let’s GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
As always, if you’d like to keep us reporting new stories every day, we do have a GoFundMe of our own located at https://gofund.me/b8144e31. All proceeds go to keeping the lights on, eating, and writing new stories to feature here and on reallycoolsite.org.
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